Miss Manners Strikes Back
Holy Crap! My kids are going to be sitting at my haute Thanksgiving table with my grandmother’s gorgeous china, multiple fork and spoon situations and ... guests! At their ages, there are no more excuses and none of their faux pas are "cute" anymore. Boot Camp starts this week.
Lucky for me, my lovely Mom gifted me additions to my personal library every year as I was growing up. My favorite books are The Goops, Tiffany's Table Manners for Teenagers
(I still refer to this one) and The Complete Works of Emily Post
. While I usually thanked her with a huge eye-roll, I am so very appreciative of her efforts now. After pouring over them, I realized that we will be lucky just to get lipstick on this pig! But, I have chosen the following 5 “manners” that my crew must observe this holiday season.
#1. Napkin in lap – I know, sad, right?
#2. Use the forks and spoons on the outside first.
#3. Spoon your soup away from you when eating.
#4. Place the butter on your bread plate, break a bite of bread off and butter only the bite you are going to eat next.
#5. Do not speak with your mouth full – or even half full! – sheesh.
I’m squeezing in one more that I just caught at dinner tonight – just in the nick of time too…
#6. Cut small bites that will fit in your mouth without you having to angle your fork all around to stuff it all in there.
Get you hair off your face, chew with your mouth closed, sit/stay in your seat, don’t feed the dog, no wrinkled noses about the food – those will all have to wait.
I’ll let you know how it goes – but, in truth, this exercise was a great refresher for me too. Wait, is that my water or yours?